...16. You wake up every morning knowing that it's quite unlikely that you're going to see the sun.

17. I've discovered mashed potatoes, boiled potatoes, smashed potatoes, jacket potatoes, chips, crisps,  AND..... the "potato" function on the microwave

18. I'm addressed as "darling, sugar, treacle, hun, sweetheart, love, (and all other versions of nicknames in that genre you normally only call your wife/lover) by staff in supermarkets, professors, bouncers, bartenders, staff in pubs and restaurants.

19. I have CCTV paranoia

20. Every sentence begins, ends, and includes,  "right." 

21. chavs............